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"A stone in the river will help one cross when the path is blocked but at what cost? For a stone to the river is the block in it's way, changing it's course without it's say. If the river could speak, would it say "no"? Would it object to someone disrupting it's flow? Or would the river be grateful to the one with the stone, embrace the change and find a new way home?"
Stones get thrown at us every day. We are continually finding obstacles in life that instantly alter the plans we had or dampen our mood for the rest of the day. From train delays that frustrate us causing us to be late, to the annoyance of a shopping bag splitting and the embarrassment of chasing those potatoes as they roll down the hill. Some days it feels like everything that could go wrong, well, did. Unfortunately, we don't have much control over such things but that doesn't mean that they don't affect us. What some people call 'the little things' can be hard to manage and even the mundane can stir up emotions within us. We want to scream, shout, cry, laugh or perhaps do nothing at all, standing in a numb bubble thinking "why is it always me?"
Other times, we are the one throwing the stone. We can be so set on doing what we feel we need to do that we don't take a moment to look around and see the consequences of our actions. It may feel like we're not in control of our instant reactions. That car cuts you up and you immediately slam your hand on the horn, right? Perhaps it's natural for emotions to get the better of us at times, but in our road rage we didn't see that sleeping baby in the pram. We won't think twice about the exhausted mother who is whispering profanities at us under her breath, now feeling overwhelmed. It's a cycle of cause and effect, and whether we're the river or the stone thrower, being mindful can help us alleviate some of these stresses.
Mindful. That's a word that gets thrown around an awful lot nowadays isn't it? Mindfulness is the process of being in the present moment: maintaining a focus on your thoughts, feelings, sensations and environment, instead of replaying past events or imagining future possibilities. Instead of becoming overwhelmed with the "should've, would've, could've" of an outcome, being mindful helps us to pause and become fully aware of our choices, actions and reactions to situations. It's not always an easy practice for some, especially when we are so used to the habitual rush of everyday life. But it can help.
Realising that we are not in control of all aspects of our lives and allowing ourselves to accept things as they are can be a great start to a more mindful existence. It can help with how we respond to others, their opinions or criticisms, how we view inconveniences in our lives and how we make the most of our circumstances. Starting with little pauses through the day, where relevant, ask yourself some of these questions:
What do I want from this?
What can I learn from this?
What is positive about this?
What am I grateful for from this?
What do I think about myself by doing this?
Over time you will find your own questions to ask yourself to remain mindful and you'll begin to see just how naturally we are able to tune into our present moment. Then one day, when another stepping stone is thrown into your path, in an odd way maybe you'll appreciate it for all that it has to offer you and you'll carry on your journey, with your new self-aware perspective.
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